Connect Four


We recently discovered a change in our connection and intimacy, with a side of discontent creeping in. 

We are together constantly.  We both work from home, so we are almost always together.   When we are not dancing, we spend a lot of time in bed.  Saturday and Sunday mornings are usually reserved for play and connecting.   

Without this time together, our intimacy can suffer.

Sometimes life gets in the way.  The house needs to be cleaned and maintained; one day turns into two.   

Once, David’s shoulder injury and my back issues flared, and two turned into three, then four.

Four Days

Four days is just too long, and it started showing a little.  A few things were beginning to bug me a bit. 

Yes, I’m a self-proclaimed neurotic about the house.

This man and I are so connected that he catches every tiny feel I have, good or bad.  I can’t BS him, either.  He knows I don’t know how, but he does, and I have a pretty decent poker face.

I thought it was the house stuff, but that was a by-product of missing our physical connection.   

Intimacy and coffee

We try to stay on top of things before unnecessarily testing our patience. We check in during our morning ritual of having coffee at the island together about intimately setting our intentions of reconnection.

Keep it Simple

We keep dinners simple on those nights using those freshly prepared all-in-one meals. Cleaning is just as easy, so we can quickly shower together. We enjoy beginning that process of reconnection & closeness by gently taking turns washing each other.

Sometimes the water isn’t the only thing getting heated up, but showers scare me with having so much hardware inside of me. 

Falls mean something very different than the average person, so we keep it fairly simple.

I usually finish up while he hops out to pull whatever toys he may want to use on me for the evening.  To him, it’s like making a wine selection. 


He even senses whether the evening needs to be gentle or powerful based on what vibes I’m putting out & I usually don’t even realize it. 

He is so in tune with and into me that I find it incredibly sexy to watch him watching me. 

Makes me think of a line in the Faith Hill song The Way You Love Me.  “I wish you could see the way you kiss OOH, I love watching you, baby, when you’re driving me crazy’. 

I feel like together, we have discovered that our love language is touch. We maintain a pretty constant surface connection, but that next-level connection is what we crave.

Our intimacy is so real and palatable that we feel it strongly if we aren’t in sync even the slightest, so we make sure to connect at least every three days but never more than four!